Comments on: Ticketed for Not Speaking English

By: PetVisionQuest

PetVisionQuest — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 00:00:24 +0000

1. failing to fail
2. possession of fries and no soda
3. possession of soda without ice
4. possession of soda-colored slip-ons
5. thumbs ups
6. head check while singing “When A Man Loves A Woman”
7. thinking about what’s in the crock pot
8. stuff in the back seat
9. not bringing extra crack for the cop
10. peeing in a bottle, you pumpkin-pie-haircutted freak
11. enjoying the drive too much
12. enjoying the sunshine
13. enjoying being a law-abiding citizen

By: willwindow

willwindow — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 02:15:33 +0000

Love #5. Yes.

By: pebble

pebble — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 22:22:28 +0000

How about tickets for:

1. not offering the cop a donut
2. not being able to outrun the overweight officer that pulled you over
3. sporting a cop mustache yourself
4. not asking the officer “do you know why you shouldn’t have pulled me over?”
5. not putting the cop under citizen’s arrest for being a driving hazard. (We’ve all seen it. Every time a cop enters the flow of traffic things get messed up, people drive unnecessarily slow, cut you off to get back into the “slow” {read: I’m not doing anything illegal} lane.)

By: willwindow

willwindow — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 23:21:34 +0000

I’m sure Obama would agree.

By: rekonstruct

rekonstruct — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 22:37:16 +0000

Wow, Texas. This is beyond scandalous, or embarrassing, even atrocious. Maybe they should start ticketing folks for how many shades darker they are than the officer who gives them the ticket. You know, 6 shades equals 60 bones. Because white is the official skin color of America, no?

By: popupstorybook

popupstorybook — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 19:55:05 +0000

Here are some:

Smelling like fresh-baked bread,
not having to sneeze,
junkyard dogs,
and living in Texas.